Sooooo.... since I haven't posted in awhile I thought I would give an update on how things are going with Cameron and myself. I'll be honest, and say that when I wrote my last post things were not in a very good spot. In a couple days Cameron will have officially been in the Navy for eight months. I really truly can't believe it. Things are going better than they were at the beginning of this year which is good, and they are definitely better than where we started at.
We've finalized a plan for our wedding, and now we're just hoping to be able to have the date that we want. Cameron is still in holding, and has been for a month now, so we still aren't sure whether he'll be on a shore command or on sea duty. Right now there is no news to update now. We would really like to get married on our anniversary partly for the romance, and partly so we get at least one anniversary to spend together while he's enlisted. For our first anniversary he was within his first two weeks of basic so he had absolutely no contact with anyone at all. I didn't even have the hope of maybe getting a phone call. I remember working most of the day that day, and actually being okay, but losing it the second I got home and saw Alexis and Douglas. Who are Alexis and Douglas? This might be really goofy, but they are our stuffed animal "children". Before Cameron left we went to Build-a-Bear and made stuffed animals for each other that each have the others voice saying "I love you" in a little sound box that you can squeeze in one of their feet. Madame Alexis Bunnykins is a little bunny Cameron made for me, and while he was in basic I took care of his dog Sir Douglas Woofs Alot. Yeah... we're that cutsey couple. But I'm very grateful for them. For about two weeks I took them everywhere with me after Cameron left. They were my comfort, and it made me very happy to have them there to hold when the person I really wanted was unavailable. They've born witness to many tears that I've shed, and they always do a great job of comforting their mommy when she's sad(See? We're just disgustingly adorable... Cameron is, of course, their daddy).
Speaking of daddies... hehe just kidding.
Right now the main thing that's been hard for me is all the pity and looks of "oh that poor thing. She has no idea what she's in for" that I seem to receive as a future Navy wife, especially a young one. It's frustrating that everyone wants to talk me out of my marriage. Honestly, if I wanted everyone's opinion, I would ask for it. I actually had a random customer at work the other day basically try to talk me out of my engagement by reminding me that half of all marriages fail, and insinuating that I was essentially doomed, and looking on me as a poor naive girl. Seriously. Lady. Shut up. I don't even know you. Just play nice with the other kids and keep your opinions to yourself.
Oh. And that reminds me. No, I do not plant to stay at home and have babies and clean. Like, what makes you think that that is every military wife's dream? Some women like that life, and some, like me, would go freakin nuts! Ugh. What frustrates me about that is that it makes it hard for me to relate to other women who are in similar positions. Even a gal who I work with who's a former Navy wife really only works to give herself something to do and let's her husband provide for her. Which is fine. I'm really happy that works for her. But I want to accomplish something. I want to have my own career, have something that I've worked hard for and that is the product of my effort and the support of my family. Cam and I have already discussed the very likely possibility that he will be a stay-at-home dad, and quite frankly, he's excited to do that. He wants me to accomplish things. He wants me to be happy, and he would rather stay at home and take care of these things than work all the time. He even mentioned something about wanting to have dinner ready for me when I got home... Sigh, oh my, am I a lucky girl or what? Just another way I don't relate to the Navy wife life. I don't mind supporting Cameron's dreams and ambitions by holding down the home front, but I really need him to do the same for me too. Maybe I'm just too new fashion for this, but I really want some equality from my relationship. 3 years and 4 months to go. Then it's his turn.... >:D
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